Doc’s Top Ten
Let me preface this top ten by saying that my opinion is 100% fact and anyone who disagrees is ignorant and knows nothing about grifball. Now let’s get into it.
Coming off a championship loss last season, Boss Tycoon has built an extremely diverse roster with players who have had nothing but success in their grifball careers. Boss boasts the league’s best K/D spread this season while Taylor Cann has proved to be a reliable second tank option with a spread of +98. While they have two capable starters in Ezy and Doc Status that are classified as runners, both have different styles and can tank when called upon. Shadow Alchemist and Totally Batty have both been reliable options as well, combining for a 9-0 record and a K/D spread of +65. Pie is also on the team, but he sucks. Likely to have the #1 seed this season, Uplifted has done exactly what was expected of them.
2. T Rich and Rockman Go Back to High School (tie)
A team of halo 3 vets, they have a roster that knows what it takes to win. After losing 7-2 to WTF in the first week of the season and being questioned on their “competitive drive”, this team has done nothing but clobber their opponents. Getting T Rich back was huge for them, as I believe he’s the best player in the league. Silva, Shadow, Determined, and T Rich all can tank against any top teams, and if they all get going at the same time I don’t see many teams having success against them. Rockys used to play for CAG so we don’t really have nice things to say about him, but Blade should be huge for them as he tells jokes on the bench and keeps morale high.
2. Monstars (tie)
This team gets a lot of love for being last season’s champions, but they haven’t been overly impressive this season, which is why I have them in the #2 spot. They have only played 4 games so far, which isn’t their fault, but it hasn’t given a full indication of what kind of team they are. ActiveHate is a decent player, but it remains to be seen if he will come up in the clutch and be the fourth they need to finish the season strong. While halfbreed, greenthumb, and some overweight guy have had success with an interchangeable fourth in the past, this season might be the most competitive Reach season yet, and they might pay the price for it this time.
4. New York Pineapples
A team that burst onto the scene in my very first Reach season (SML11), they have gone from an underdog to a favorite and boast a lineup that took Monstars to the wire in a 5-4 game earlier this season. RDG NHL is easily one of the best tanks in the league, and even though I’m still coping with SlimJim getting more all-star votes than me in SML11, he is a very capable runner. joe eduardo is a reliable tank as well, but if they want to make the jump from being a playoff team to a championship team, four to oh is going to have to step up and play better for them.
5. Way to Fail
One of the most consistently good teams in Reach grifball, this season is no different for WTF. They started off the season with a huge win over TRaRGBtHS (never typing that again) but lost to them in week 4 6-3. While they have a strong roster with Priest and Digital leading the way, I don’t think they match up well with any of the top three teams. They should breeze through their remaining 4 games and end up with a solid seed, but they will need Rage More Nerd, man canon, or silentshadow to step up for the loss of Determined and play great in the playoffs if they want to prove me wrong and show that they can compete for a championship.
6. Four Guys One Ball
These guys have put together a very impressive season, going undefeated and scoring a respectable 76 goals, just 3 less than the number 1 team on my list. TrueFlyingCow has scored a league leading 39 goals this season with a positive K/D spread and less than 2 betrayals a game. Crusader102 has been nothing short of elite this season, going +144 and 10-0 this season. Jedi Hunter and L1ghts4ber have both been nice compliments to him, going +78 and +62 in just 12 games combined. The division they played in was fairly weak, but this team has the talent to turn some heads come playoff time.
7. Jamaican Hop Scotch Mafia
While their record may not be impressive, their 3 losses came to Uplifted, arguably the best team in the league. NOPLEX has had an extremely impressive regular season, going +123 in 9 games, which includes playing in all 3 of their losses to Uplifted. Having tanked against him first hand, he is the real deal and can give anyone fits (except BossTycoon apparently). Killerz and Tygra have also put together respectable seasons, combining to go +176 in 17 games. However, they also combined for 53 betrayals, which could end up being a big problem. Neo is an adequate runner and though his stats are less than impressive, he can do enough to help this team win. Depending on the seeding, I could see this team advancing in the playoffs.
8. The Fatal Four
Much like the Hop Scotch Mafia, this team had a tough team in their division, but could not come away with an impressive victory. However, in week 4 they took Four Guys One Ball to the limit in a 5-4 contest and they have a roster of players with lots of experience. Bluecollarkid has always been a solid runner, and could land enough stiff-arms to give players like Maj, got3nks, and Mikoolich time to tank him in for the score. While I don’t believe this team will win a playoff game, I think bluecollar could create opportunities for it to happen.
I’ll be honest, I have no idea who any of the players on this team are, but the record they have this season is very impressive. With 42 goals in 5 games, they have the most GPG in the entire league. They are all in a clan together, so they have the chemistry needed to win games. However, they went 2-6 last season sporting pretty much the same roster. I think their success has come because of an easy division, but since I haven’t seen them play, we’ll have to assume they have some sort of talent.
10. The Thundercats (tie)
Again, I haven’t heard of any of these players, but they are enjoying some success this season. They beat Qwib-Qwib’s Ambition 2 out of the 3 games this season which should give them enough to win the division. Liono5969 and ixPanthro have combined for an extremely impressive +203 in 10 games this season and snarf has scored 19 of their 28 goals. It looks like they might lack a legitimate fourth, but I’m interested to see how this team can do against some of the other teams on this list.
10. Flaming Grif Balls (tie)
I’ll be honest, this team name is absolutely awful. They play in an extremely weak division, but have gone 7-1 nonetheless with their one loss coming to GentINC. None of them have extremely impressive stats, but I think this is more of a good thing than a bad thing. It leads me to believe that they win games because of teamwork and intangibles, and not just going out and hammering everything. Congrats on a nice season, but I think this team will be lucky to score a goal in the playoffs.
If you are still reading this article, congratulations. Yes, I put my team #1. This is because I’m the greatest and I win games. Good luck to all of your teams in the playoffs, and may the odds be ever in your favor.